After several LONG flights, cancellations, and delays we made it to North Carolina at 2am on January 3. We were suppose to meet Shinara and our son at the agency at 9am so we tried to get a few hours of sleep before leaving again. (Let's be real, we didn't sleep... we were meeting our son in less than 7 hours!!) At 9am we pulled up to the agency. Being a mom of 3 and going through this adoption process before, you'd think I'd be fine and know what to expect. But I didn't. I was a ball of nerves and couldn't wait to see my son for the first time. We had never received a picture because they wanted us to be surprised so I couldn’t wait to see his sweet face.
Shinara was running a few minutes late so in the meantime we finished up some of the final paperwork before they opened the door to the meeting room.
There she was, sitting by the table holding our precious baby boy. I will never forget the flood of emotions that came with seeing not only him for the first time, but also her. This is the woman that chose ME to be the mother of her son. She was trusting me with his LIFE and that meant the world to me. As we walked around the table she immediately stood up and motioned for me to hold him. I lost it. I remember being so scared before entering the room, wondering what she would think of me. Would she let me hold him? Would she talk to me? Would she hug me? Would she still be happy with her decision?
In that moment, I felt God's presence and knew He was with us. We spent the next 1/2 hour staring at him, snuggling him, and visiting with Shinara. Then the social worker started to close our conversation and discussed what the on-going communication would look like before saying our goodbyes. We agreed to having an open relationship and sharing pictures and information as much as she felt comfortable with. We wanted her to be in our life, forever. She would ALWAYS be family.
Hi, I'm Kansas! I wish we could be doing this face to face over coffee. Maybe someday, till then this will have to do!